Dr. Bola Akin-John has identified the causes of the vulnerability of ministers of God generally to sexual sin such as fornication, adultery, masturbation, pornography, pedophilia, homosexual, incest, bestiality and lesbianism among other sexual perversions. The Church Growth expert admits that like other human beings ministers of God too naturally have sexual desires but they should carefully avoid the pitfalls of satisfying that natural desires in sinful manners. He identifies some pitfalls to sexual sin, counsels ministers of God who have fallen into any form of sexual sin on how to seek repentance, healing, deliverance and reconciliation with God and their spouses, and also addresses other issues on Sexuality and Sexual Perversions Behind the Pulpit in the below interview with an issue-oriented Christian Benefits magazine. Excerpts.
Sir, in recent times sexual sin, especially fornication and adultery is becoming alarming among ministers of God. Please, what could be responsible for this?
Let’s start by first looking at the intricacies, the fragility and the vulnerability of a call into ministry that the ministers of God must note, beware and handle carefully. When you are coming into ministry, first, you must know that ministry is a calling of temptations, including sexual temptation. That, as a minister you will never be tempted throw that to the dogs. Jesus too was tempted. So, you will also be tempted. Ministry gives ministers easy access and opportunity to the opposite sex. If you are in ministry either as a singer, writer, preacher, teacher, evangelist, prophet, apostle, bishop, archbishop or even as the pope you will be exposed to all sorts of temptations. Ministry puts trust in you and requires you to prove you are trustworthy. Ministry opens you up to the good, the bad and the ugly. For instance, as a male minister during counseling some women may expose you to their emotional feelings, and if good care is not taken you may unsuspectingly succumb to their sinful emotional desires. I have been in ministry for over 35 years and can tell you that the lady you see in public is not the same lady you will see in secret. She has dual personality.
As humans too, pastors are not immune to sexual desires. What are the pitfalls they must avoid from satisfying their natural sexual desires in sinful ways?
As you rightly said, pastors are humans too with blood running in their veins. So, they too naturally have sexual desires. However, to guide against satisfying their natural sexual desires in sinful manners, pastors must avoid or handle carefully the pitfalls to sexual sin. The first pitfall they must handle well is admiration. If a minister is gifted, talented, physically endowed; handsome or beautiful with good carriage and is intellectual among other attractive attributes he/she easily draws the admiration of the opposite sex. People admire gifts, skills, talents, good manners; spiritual and physical endowments, which may become sensuous problems to the admired from the admirer, and if unchecked may lead to fornication or adultery between the admired and the admirer. Most women admire five basic qualities in men. Good physical stature (tall, handsome, lanky and good dress sense). Good English speaking. Good carriage/comportment. Good career or qualifications. Good purse; that is, big cash! When a woman comes close to you and sees all or some of these five qualities in you as a man she will admire you. Aside these five qualities, women also admire gifts and talents. This explains why gospel music ministers are the most vulnerable to sexual sin among other gospel ministers like preachers, teachers, evangelists, pastors, prophets and apostles etc. So, as a male minister If you are a gentleman and cool-headed, handsome, disciplined, educated, well-mannered and have good cash women will easily admire you to the extent of seeking or wishing of having sex with you. So, you must be careful of admiration. The second pitfall is a strong sexual appetite. Women love men with sexual prowess. As a male minister who can sex very well if you come close to a sex-crazy woman, she will lure you into having sex with her, or you will lure her into having sex with you. If you are a male minister with an insatiable sex appetite but often away from home in church or on outside ministrations you are vulnerable to having sex with your office secretary or any available woman on your outside ministrations. The same applies to female ministers with a strong sexual drive but whose husbands are not always around, they are vulnerable to having sex with their driver, choir leader, Sunday teacher, a willing elder or any other member of their church. Some can even go as far as paying money to the young boys called gigolos to sex them. The third pitfall is indiscipline and carelessness. A minister who is indiscipline in conducts, character and interaction with the opposite sex is vulnerable to sexual sin. If you visit alone at home an opposite sex living alone you are vulnerable to having sex with that person. The indiscipline of gluttony of some ministers eating all kinds of foods from all manners of female members or entertaining all manners of female members in their homes to cook, wash and do other house chore for them makes them highly vulnerable to having sex with such members. Engaging in suggestive plays, amorous jokes, careless talks and banters with the opposite sex recklessly is part of the indiscipline and carelessness that often leads some ministers into sexual sin.
What can help ministers in avoiding these pitfalls considering that they cannot but meet, relate and interact with the opposite sex due to the nature of their job?
The main help is prayer. We can’t easily avoid these pitfalls outside God because we are sexual beings and are easily aroused by the opposite sex. Second, we must prayerfully with determination deal with the spirit of lust. It is lust that stirs us to sexual immorality. Sexual immorality starts from lusting after the opposite sex. As normal men (including ministers) when we see any beautiful woman with nice curves, pointed boobs, big buttocks, long hairs, tall or slim and classy, naturally we intend towards lusting after her; wishing our wife looks like her, or wishing to have sex with her all together. If you allow that wishing or thinking into your system you will have emotional issues. Same thing applies to women, if they come across any man even with just one of the five basic qualities that I mentioned that most woman admire in men, they will lust after him. They may wish the man is their husband, or wish they can have sex with him. If the person is a minister they may intentionally visit him in his church for counseling, when they actually have no need for counseling than just to get his attention or come close to him. If he is their church pastor they may intentionally invite him to their house for special prayer when they are alone at home. That is why ministers must ensure visiting an opposite sex church member in their homes for special prayer or other needs in the company of at least two other mutually know persons with them. As a young minister I fell in the trap of a particular woman who invited me to her house for special prayer with the intention of seducing me to have sex with her in her house but God saved me.